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28 Jul

Dear Diary, today I …….

Did you have a daily diary when you were a kid? I got one for my 10th birthday and for the first few weeks I dutifully filled the pages with the minutia of  my life and trust me, when you’re 10, in most cases minutia is being polite. I tried really hard to find something to say but I got bogged down in the need to physically put words on paper.

One of many mouldering old buildings in the Okanagan

When I was in school, I did exceptionally well when it came to composing stories, at least as long as I was partnered and my partner was willing to be my scribe while I dictated. I helped with the vocabulary but not the spelling since I sucked at it.

Which leads me back to the stupid diary. I could talk to it all I wanted and no words would appear on the pages and since I hated to write, it didn’t take long before the diary got stuffed in a drawer and forgotten. To this day I really don’t enjoy the physical act of writing. If I write slowly and carefully, my writing, so I’ve been told is quite lovely, but since I am usually trying to write as fast as my brain is coming up with the words, it usually devolves into something even I have difficulty deciphering.

A beautiful insect that posed for me on the back deck.

As for typing, well, I’ll give you a small glimpse into my adolescent thinking. It was Grade 9 and we were required to decide what courses we wanted to take as electives. My choices were between typing class and Gourmet cooking. I reasoned that if I took typing, I would end up being someones secretary and as far as I was concerned that just wasn’t ever going to happen, so cooking won out.  Eventually, I graduated with honours plus a complete inability to type. The funny part about that is eventually I landed a job as an executive secretary for one of the Regional Managers of what was then known as Radio Shack. He was well aware of my lack of typing skills, but it was my personality that won me the job, besides he figured even using the hunt and peck method I could eventually put together a respectable letter, given enough time and White Out. Ever since then I have perfected the 4 finger typing skills that I currently employ.

Talking on the other hand is certainly a skill I have in abundance. My brain is filled with jokes, stories, trivia and a great deal of information on many different subjects gathered over the years. I could keep just about anyone entertained for hours and did so for over 15 years as a fishing guide. You’ve got to have something to talk about when the fish aren’t biting and being able to hold intelligent conversations with people from all walks of life makes for a good time for all concerned, as well as resulting in fairly large tips.

I also have what many seem to think of as a bad habit. Anyone who knows me well has certainly heard me talking to myself. Hell I’ve even been known to argue vociferously with myself and I don’t care what anyone says, I’m not crazy!

Having a conversation with myself has allowed me over the years to write well received speeches, worked out ways to ask for raises and to tell people to bugger off in such a manner that they weren’t even aware they’d been insulted. It also helps me write this blog. I pour over subjects I want to explore, I work out  how it will sound by saying it out loud and that works for me. The only problem I have is I’m still waiting for voice activated computers like they had on “Star Trek”. I want a bloody computer that hears what I’m saying, waits till I tell it to write it down, prints it in a readable format then sends it to this blog.

I can dream can’t I?

Another old building abandoned and allowed to return to the earth in it's own time. There are many of these scattered all over the region.

When I get into conversations with people and we start to talk about our lives, eventually they look at me and say, “You should write a book.” I answer by saying, “Thanks, I admit that my life has certainly taken some interesting turns and the thought has occurred to me, but my journey isn’t even close to being over yet and maybe, when I’m old and decrepit I’ll think of putting words to paper.”

Yeah, right, only if I can find a Boswell who’ll work for free. Though perhaps technology will come to my rescue. The eldest was just telling me last night about an app on I Touch that just might do the trick. So who knows, maybe one of these days I’ll be telling you about my new book, though please don’t hold your breath waiting, it could well be a very long wait.

In the meantime you’ll just have to be satisfied with the poor ramblings of an over heated brain as I blog my way through the ether.